We all know that new year’s resolutions don’t last.
Partly because they tend to be negative – all about giving things up, which our subconscious struggles to picture, so it doesn’t take any action. “To drink less” just makes me feel like having a drink!
Then there’s often very little motivation to stick to a long term change – a whole year of not eating curry, why would I want that?? But a year of looking and feeling great…. THAT could be worth giving up curry for (almost!).
….and the difficulty of changing habits, of any kind. for example, it’s been shown that giving up smoking is almost impossible without help from someone else.
So – what do you want to achieve in this new year, at work and at home? Make a list!
And what do you enjoy doing, that you want to do more of? Add it to your list.
Remember that friends contribute most of our happiness, followed by experiences. Material things don’t make much difference. So your list should include things you want to do with friends, and friends you are going to spend more time with, and experiences that you plan to have. These could be travel but they could just be spending more time out walking, or at the beach, or playing or watching sport with friends, Add these to your list too!
Other areas to think about are
- health (food, drink, exercise, stress and sleep),
- finances,
- family,
- people you’ve lost touch with (maybe even fallen out with),
- travel,
- charity and good causes,
- security,
- daily routines,
- your longer term career,
- side-hustles,
- your house – and garden if you have one,
- self-development for work or personal reasons,
- any books you want to read,
- things to let go of or throw away (physical and mental), including toxic people
- regular commitments or projects you want to cut,
- how you spend your time during your day,
- are you efficient enough? do you have clear goals?
- creative outlets,
- fun and play,
- impact on your colleagues at work, anything that’s making you feel guilty?
………- did any of those spark ideas for changes you want to make for the coming year?
Then, here are some thoughts to help you clarify your list:
- Do you REALLY want it?
- Why? (Make sure it’s not someone else’s dream!)
- What if you didn’t do it – how would you feel? Another year slipped by and you still haven’t done it. Missed the chance, perhaps.
- How good would you feel if you actually DID it? About doing the thing itself, but also about yourself as a get-things-done person
- What would you need to put in place, and do every day, to make it happen? Habits / reminders / system / join a group / make a schedule or a plan….?
- What are you going to do when you stumble, to get back on track? Because you WILL lapse occasionally….
- Who can help you to make this happen?
Remember that clear goals are the most important thing you can EVER do for your success and happiness in life, because they set your mental satnav and they give you the motivation to go faster in that direction, they make you more disciplined, more assertive about distractions, and more observant of opportunities when they crop up.
PS if you want help with your year, a bit of a push from me every ow and then, with new ideas feeding in all the time, you could try
- my year of happiness – weekly happiness ideas for the whole of the coming year
- my efficiency coaching – a five year drip feed of efficiency ideas
- my life coaching – 150 messages during the coming year, covering everything for success and happiness
- my 49 courses which are on Udemy
